Fighting for your love
by scouting4rach
Summary: When Edward leaves, Bella is heartbroken but tries not to show it. When her emotions catch up with her she tries to commit suicide. What happens when the volturi gets involved and the Cullens find her? Eventually BxEM
1. Chapter 1

**Diclaimer: I own nothing from Twilight, it is, unfortunately, all Stephenie Meyers**

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"I'm leaving, Bella"

My world came crashing down from those 3 words. All the happiness I have had this past year was erased. It just vanished, the days out, all the 'I love you's', all the promises. I tried to compose myself so that I could get out a full sentance without completely breaking down. By now the tears were streaming steadily down my face.

"You can't leave Edward! What about us? Your promised me you wouldn't leave! _**You promised**_!" I screamed out the last words as my knees buckled underneath me and I fell to the forest floor.

"Technically I only promised to stay with you as long as you're not in danger." Edward sneered at me. " And, you are in danger. From my own _family_. Don't you see we can never work out after this?" he asked.

"There is a way to stop me from being in danger though," I pleaded, "you can change me! we can be happy, Edward.... Just don't leave!"

"I'm sorry Bella...but there's something I need to tell you... I have been lying through my teeth during this conversation. I'm not leaving because it's dangerous... I'm leaving because I don't love you anymore. I wasn't going to tell you, but because you don't seem to want to let me go I had to tell you."

I looked up slowly into his eyes, they were emotionless. Blank. These eyes were not the eyes of my Edward.

"You... don't... love me?" I choked out, not understanding the words.

"I'm so sorry Bella, I never meant to hurt you... The truth is I never loved you. I wanted you around for your blood, it smells so sweet and I needed to be able to resist other humans blood that was like yours without problems. Please believe me when I say I never meant to hurt you. I have taken all the things that you may remember me by, so when I leave it will be as if I never existed."

My heart broke more with every word. I felt like I was being stabbed by every word. Not just stabbed but stabbed slowly, and it felt as if the knife was being twisted around slowly every time. How could he believe I would forget him like that? After all we had be thought he could just walk away and that I would forget this? He is _wrong_. My anger started to flare up out of me and I couldn't control it. Suddenly I stood up and started screaming at him.

"You think you can just do this? Just... _leave _me and I'll _forget _you? You know what? Just go... I don't like liars, just.. _**get out of my sight**_!"

He was obviously shocked by my outburst but by now I couldn't care less. It still felt like my heart was broken, but for once I was standing up for myself. I was sure I couldn't keep this up for long though, I would eventually revert back to the broken mess that I was when he told me he was leaving. Leaving without me.

"Bella I am sorry, I'll leave now... I thought it would be best if I told you rather than continue with this lie. My family are leaving with me. I say goodbye for them aswell. In a way I will always love you, but not the way you want. You were only a blood desensitiser for me and I thought I loved you, but I was naeve. Without me or my family, you can finally lead a normal life. Have kids, grandkids and a family that you won't have to give up. You can have a home. Goodbye, Bella"

With those final words, he lightly kissed my forehead and run off into the woods, leaving me alone to gather my thoughts. I could feel that the heartbroken Bella was making her way back, and I wanted to get home and isolate myself before that happened. There was no need to worry anyone over my emotional state because of this. I can atleast _try_ and be normal for everyone. Not that theres anyone left. Everyone leaves me. The Cullen's didn't even say goodbye! I thought they were my family.. I must have thought wrong. What kind of family leaves you without a goodbye?

With that revelation over, I slowly made my way back to Charlies before he got back home. Even like this I wouldn't want him to worry. He's not the best with emotions. I only noticed as I was walking that night had started to creep up on me, and the trail was dark with only a small amount of light from the moon seeping through the trees. Who knows how I'm meant to get back without tripping and making myself look worse than I already was from a mixture of crying and begging on the forest floor.

I must have had a streak of luck, because I only tripped over 3 times on the way back. Then again, the house was quite quick to get back to. _Edward_ *flinch* didn't take me that far into the woods. He still knew that I would most likely get lost if he did. He still knew what I was like, and maybe even still cared about what would happen to me? He did tell me that the woods were a dangerous place once. I could only hope that he did still care. With that msall flicker of hope I made my way into the house and up to my room, leaving a note to Charlie saying that I went straight to bed. Little did I know that with sleep, came horrible nightmares.

_***Nightmare***_

_It started out like any normal dream. Topaz eyes burnings into mine, then the scene switched to show me sitting in the meadow with Edward. We were staring at eachother, not breaking eye contact. Then his smooth velvet voice rung through the meadow._

_"I love you Bella, you are my everything. I'll never leave you. For the rest of my existance."_

_Dream Bella smiled at Edward and reached out to grab his hand. But then he started to fade away from sight, into the darkness of the trees. Dream me just stared at him until he was gone, smiling with small tears creeping down her smooth cheeks._

_Suddenly, the scene changes. One person is left standing in a dark meadow, no stars are out, only a dark moon. Small, it is only a new moon, not large enough to give much light. The person is looking around franticly, calling out to the dark trees. _

_"Edward? _**Edward**_! Come back! You _**promised **_you wouldn't leave me! Come back! Where did you go?"_

_This dream Bella looks different to the other. She has tears pouring down her face and her dress is torn and dirty from being on the ground. Her hair is windblown and messy and her eyes are not as bright. She is still calling out to the darkness when someone speaks out from the darkness._

_"I don't love you anymore Bella. I never loved you, you were just entertainment. My family hates you, they only played along for the fun of it. Anyway, who are _you_, a puny _human_, to think you can be loved by beautiful, intelligent vampires?"_

_His beautiful voice rang out around the meadow, but it was different. There was no emotion to the voice. Dream Bella started screaming after him until the dream slowly started to fade into blackness._

_***End nightmare***_

I woke up screaming, with my pyjamas sticking to my body and my sheets tangled around me. I sat up in bed, trying to clear my mind of the horrible dream. I looked over at the window, still open, letting cold air into my bedroom. It was then that I decided to totally shut _Edward _*flinch* out of this life. I walked out of my bedroom to the hallway cupboard quietly, trying not to wake up Charlie as I got a hammer and some nails out of the toolbox. It was quite early in the morning, 4am to be exact, so I had to be really quiet while I was working. I started out by closing my window, the window that _he_ always used to come in by, then I nailed it securely shut. Not that it would stop a vampire from getting in if it really wanted to, but it proved my point. I wasn't over my heartbreak. Infact, I doubt I would ever be, he was my life and he left. Just thinking about it made me tear up, but this helped a bit. Lets just see how the next few weeks go.

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A/N: I should hopefully be updating quite a bit until I get back to school... which is like somethimes near the beginning of Spetember so expect quite a few chapters ^^


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything except most of the plot :(**

**A/N: I'd like to that the people who reviewed and added my stories to favourties and put it on alert!**

**OH and this chapter is dedicated to Brokenfromthepast for being my first reviewer! :D anyways, heres chapter 2**

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It had been 3 weeks since _he_ left me. I had barely left the house since then. My heart was officially broken, and I knew that it would take alot to fix it. I had been isolating myself from everyone. My friends and my family. Charlie worried about me, and because of that I hadn't told him that I thought about ways to end my life. If he did know I'm sure he would have literally forced me to go out and cheer up. But atleast he knew I was in no state to go to school at that moment. I had been off school for a week and Angela told me the rumours were flying around the school as people were wondering why I was not in. Luckily for me, it was in the middle of a holiday that _Edward_ *flinch* broke up with me, so the gossip mill hadn't been running for that long.

The past 3 weeks had been horrible. When Charlie first talked to me the morning after he was seriously worried. It turns out I did wake him up that night, but not from getting the tool-box from the cupboard, but from the dream screaming. I'd been having the same dream for a while now, round-about the same dream at the sime time each night, but theres usually a little change for each of them. Every morning I would wake up at the same time - 4am - and I could barely get back to sleep without another nightmare. Sometimes I didn't wake up screaming, they were the good nights... I thought I was getting more used to the dreams. But I always seemed to wake up Charlie. He hadn't been getting much sleep either because of it, he even came in to check on me most mornings just incase I was screaming for a different reason. I could tell he was worried about me, but I got annoyed by it.

Anyways, as I was saying. I'd missed a week of school. Charlie let me stay off as long as I got my work. I could tell he wanted me to go back, but I don't think I was ready just yet. Angela had been most supportive of me them weeks. I told her what happened and she was the one who got my work for me. I had done all my work for that week though, so I had nothing to distract me from myself that weekend. The only time I had been out those past weeks had been to go shopping for the essentials. I couldn't exactly make Charlie starve because of me can I? So I always went out twice a week to get the groceries.

I sighed and got ready for the morning, I could tell that Charlie was going to want to know if I was going back to school the next week. I thought I might try and avoid him that morning though, he was going fishing down at La Push anyway. He should have be leaving in about... I glanced at the clock and saw it was 6am... half an hour. I decided to take a long shower so that Charlie would have left before I was finished. I gathered up my toiletries and a change of clothes and made my way to the bathroom. Lately I started to have boiling hot showers. It made my skin burn, but I liked the pain. It helped to dull the pain from my heart. No-one except myself knew how much pain I was in, after all everyone thought that it was only a silly high-school relationship I had, but I knew different. It was love. Well to me it was anyway. After my shower, I went downstairs to make sure that Charlie had left. When I got down there, I noticed a note on the fridge in Charlies handwriting.

_Bells,_

_I had to get out earlier for my fishing trip because the weathers meant to be bad later on, so I'll be home earlier than planned_

_-Charlie_

Well, that wass just great. I'd have to have 'the talk' earlier than I'd expected. I really wondered if I was ready for school again. I was sure Angela would be nice and sit with me, and wherever she goes her boyfriend, Ben, goes. So atleast I'd have 2 people on my side. I personally didn't want to sit with the normal crowd. I'd been told that the news of _Edward_ *flinch* leaving had gone around the school, and that meant that Mike would be worse than usual. I could have always done something to myself to stop me from having to go to school? Or if Jess saw that Mike was all over me she might have done something that got me out of school? Hm, that was something I could consider.

One thing was wrong though, if I went back to school, everyone would have been sympathetic. I didn't want _anyones_ sympathy. I got enough from Charlie, and I know Angela wass sympathetic but tried not to show it. And to be quite honest... I was fed up of being quiet, shy Bella. I thought it was time for a change. _He _changed my personality, so why don't I change my appearance? That would be so cool to see what people thought of me then. Infact, I think I'd do just that. I was fed up of getting dragged down in the dirt. It was time for _change._

With my mind made up I decided to totally get a whole new wardrobe and hairstyle to complete it. I ran up the stairs to my room, obviously I tripped on the way, I'd have to change that (aka my clumsiness). A totally new me. I decided to stick to what I was wearing that day, and, well, seen as the old me was shy with clothing I decided to just burn my whole wardrobe. I only had a few outfits anyway, and alot of boring tops. Blue was definately out of the question, it was _his _favourite colour on me after all. The only parts of my wardrobe that I ended up keeping were my sweats, a few tanks and my converses. In the bottom of my cupboard I found an outfit that Alice gave me during the summer. That had to go aswell, there was no remembering the Cullens. I mean, I still loved them, they didn't hurt me as much as _he _did, but he said that they didn't even like me so why should I have kept the stuff they gave me? Anyway, I'd just burn the rest of my stuff. I also decided to re-decorate my room. I mean, come-on, it was like, the same for years. I might aswell blow part of my college fund, right? So I decided to go out and get everything I needed.

I went downstairs, grabbed my jacket and keys to my truck and wrote a quick note for Charlie. No need for him to be worried if I didn't end up coming back until late.

_Dad,_

_I've gone shopping with Ang and Ben for some clothes and what-not, don't know what time I'll be back because we're going to Seattle. Oh, and I've decided to redecorate my room because I havent done it up in ages._

_- Bella_

I'd lied about going with Angela. I'd definately have to call her so that she could cover for me. If I didn't go out with someone I doubt Charlie would have let me go, and personally I'd much prefer to be alone without anyone asking questions as to why I was buying so many clothes or whatever. Oh well, I had my house and truck keys, I had my purse and I had left a note for Charlie. I thought that was all I needed to do so I left quickly so I could get to Seattle on time, slamming the front door behind me.

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**A/N: well theres chapter 2... it isn't as long and I know its set 3 weeks after but I'll just say that during them 3 weeks Bella was the zombie Bella ok? yeah just imagine that... and I decided my Bella was gonna get over ti quciker than the books Bella. As you can tell she's started with the suicidal thoguhts, and shes still depressed although she doesn't want to show it, so she does it in private with certain things like the shower beign boiling hot so it burns her... it just shows you how much she prefers physical pain rather than emotional if you get me?**

**but yeah, thats chapter 2? any improvements I could make, or naything you want me to put into the plot for later? I might decide to do that and if I did, I'd dedicate the chapter that the plot is in to you :D Rate/Review please and thankyou**

**-Rach xx**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N - Sorry for not updating for ages, I'll get much more time to update when my exams are done though (:**

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Although I was still hurting inside over my heartbreak, I decided I wouldn't show it to anyone and that I would plaster on a fake smile and get on with my life. Today was the day I went back to school. I was a changed person and I could not wait to see what people thought of the new me.

While I was out in Seattle I had decided to go with the punky aswell as a cute style, and had bought so many things that I could probably have given Alice a run for her money. I'd actually found out that I quite like shopping when no-ones bossing me around and choosing what I should and should not wear. I ended up buying clothes in bright colours like pink, purple, yellow, orange, red etc. with black to go with it to make the colours pop, and I had even bought lots of funky accessories like earrings with guitars, fruits, hearts and stars on them and they were also all mainly in fluorescent colours for my punky style, but I had also bought some more normal clothes for days where I just feel like looking cute but they were still colourful.

Over the rest of the weeked I decided to work on my co-ordination and, if I do say so myself, I am pretty damn graceful when I want to be. Practicing walking in heels and stilettos had really helped my balance, and after a few scrapes and bruises I had finally got the hang of walking in them. All it took was some time and effort that I had never had before. Oh, did I tell you I also died my hair? Black, with some of my old colour still showing through in streaks. It actually look quite cool.

Anyways, like I said today was the day that the new Bella was coming out. Today I'd decided to wear a black tanktop, a black and pink striped mini skirt, a pink-studded black belt, some leggings on underneath and some black boots with pink hearts above the ankle. To accessorize I'd used a black bow-tie necklace and some black rubber bracelets. I'd just put my hair up into a sloppy ponytail today and put a pink bow clip in my hair. Finally, I applyed a small amount of lipgloss and eyeliner and I was finished. Ready for my first day back at school. **(A/N - outfit on profile)**

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_Why did I decide to do this again?_ I thought to myself as I was sat in my truck before school. Not many people were here yet, but the ones that were here were staring at me, well what they could see of me anyway. When more people were finally in, I saw my group of friends standing by the benches, and it was then I plucked up my newly-found courage and got out of my truck, gracefully I might add, and strutted over towards them after I'd grabbed my school bag.

To be quite honest I was feeling quite grateful for the attention, well some of it anyways. Everyone was staring at me, and I do mean everyone. The boys looked really surprised and some looked like they wanted to talk to me, and most girls looked on enviously at me. I think the most shocked would have to be my friends. Standing by the benches were Mike, Jessica, Tyler, Ben, Lauren, Angela and Eric. All looking totally shocked as I walked towards them. Well, Angela and Ben weren't as I'd told Angela last night about what happened and I'm guessing she told Ben. They were both smiling at me as I came up to them. You can just guess who made the first comment, right?

'Wow Bella... you look... just wow' Mike said sounding very very shocked.

'Yeah Bella you look H-O-T' Tyler said with a wink.

Lauren and Jess were looking on in jelousy because they weren't getting any attention from the boys. All this attention was surprisingly welcomed by me for once. I felt... free from the burden of _him_ for once.

'Thanks Mike and Tyler' I smiled at them both. 'I thought that it was time for a change, ya'know? And it feels great!'

It really did. I for once felt as if I had control of my life. It probably wouldnt last long, but why not revel in the feeling right?

It was then that the bell went and so I headed off to the first class of the day.

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When I pulled into the driveway after school it was raining. That must have been why I was so startled to see a dark figure standing underneath the porch, which I might add wasn't very good at keeping the rain away. I quickly got out of my truck and run over to the porch and saw Billy's son, Jacob, standing there by himself. He must have been waiting for someone for a while because he actually looked a bit like a drowned rat. But I wasn't mean enough to say that.

'Jacob! What are you doing here? You're absoulutely soaked! You need to get inside like now!'

I grabbed the key from under the mat and opened the door as quickly as I could then ushered Jacob inside before we got even more wet from the rain.

I showed him into the kitchen, and went to drop off my school stuff into my bedroom. When I came back downstairs Jacob was sitting on one of the chairs at the table, so I sat down with him to find out what he wanted.

'So, Jacob, what are you doing here? It's a bit surprising coming home and seeing you waiting to be let in.'

'I just thought I'd come and see you Bella, we haven't seen eachother in a while, and I was wondering how you were doing after the break-up'

I flinched as he mentioned Edward, and I think Jacob noticed that, but luckily he didn't comment on it. I really was hoping to avoid these conversations about Edward, seen as I wasn't even comfortable enough to talk to Charlie about it.

'Err... I'm okay I guess. Much better than I was when it first happened. Infact I think I'll be just fine. I even went and got a new look to show that I'll be fine'

I stood up and done a small twirl for him to see my outfit. It was definately one of my better outfits that I bought, and I had decided that my new favourite colour was bright pink. When I'd done my little twirl I sat back down before my new-found co-ordination failed me and made me fall over.

'Wow. You look great Bella!'

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After talking some more about my change in wardrobe and hair, I decided it was time to make dinner and I invited Jacob to stay. I made my special lasagne, and left Charlie some in the microwave for later. After dinner Jacob said he had to go, and that he would try and come and see me soon. When he had left I stuck a note near where Charlie hangs his coat up after work explaining that his meal was in the microwave and that I was tired so I was going to bed.

I had another horrible dream about Edward that night.

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**A/N - I hope you liked it, and yet again, sorry for not updating. I think next chapter is where we will be getting another day at school with some drama, and a mystery POV comes in... it will be easy enough to guess when its been done though (:**

**oh and sorry for all the lines .  
**

**-Rach xx**


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: Yeah I've finally gotten round to updating, sorry for taking so long. Here's a new chapter, and I hope to keep updating this regularly now. The outfit Bella wears should be on my profile so you can check it out. Oh and I don't own any of the characters in this story (: Enjoy!**

I woke up early in the morning after the nightmare. It was the same as before, but with minor changes at the end. This time someone else came into the picture, but they were blurry and dark so I couldn't see who it was. But as they started to get lighter my dream started to fade out and I woke up.

I decided to go downstairs and have my breakfast before I cleaned myself up ready for the day. When I got downstairs I saw that Charlie had left a note for me, telling me that he was down at the station as he got called in because of a disappearance. It was suspicious, but I got over it. After eating some toast I went upstairs and got dressed for the day. I ended up wearing some blue shorts, a grey top with a tiger on it, mixed blue bangles, grey wedges and a blue patterned scarf.

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When I got to school, I knew that something was going to happen today. Something bad. It was only a feeling, but there was something about the feeling that made me worried. However, there was no time to dwell on my feeling as the warning bell went as soon as I was getting out of my truck.

By lunch, the bad feeling had been getting worse. I don't know what was going to happen, but it would be bad. Well, at least it would be bad for me. As I walked into the cafeteria people were staring at me and I could see Lauren and Jessica whispering and pointing. I don't know what the problem was, so I just decided to go and get my lunch. I picked out an apple and a bottle of water as I wasn't feeling well because of this stupid feeling, and made my way towards the table.

Everyone seemed to stop talking as I got to the table, so I knew something was wrong, and that they were most likely talking about me. Lauren and Jessica has malicious smiles on their faces, so I knew that it would have something to do with them. As soon as I sat down Lauren starting talking to me.

'So, Bella, I like heard about you and Edward breaking up. Like, what happened? Did he finally see that you weren't good enough for him and leave?' She said.

'Yeah Bella, he moved all the way to LA I heard, pretty far away he went, maybe he wanted to make sure he never saw your ugly face again. I mean, he was like a God compared to _you,_ everyone was always wondering why you managed to get him when like, no-one else could' Jessica chimed in, backing up Lauren.

I was looking down at my water bottle, twirling the lid, and tears were gathering at the corners of my eyes. I wouldn't cry though, I wouldn't let Jessica and Lauren have the satisfaction of seeing me upset over it.

'I heard that you put out after you first met him. I bet that was why you managed to get him, after all why else would he go for you? I mean you're not the best looking person in the school. Or maybe he thought you were the shiny new toy and so he wanted to try and play with you. Did he get bored? I bet that was it.' Lauren said all of this with a sneer on her face, and jessica was nodding along with her agreeing.

This was too far, and made my insecurities come up to the front of my mind again and so I quickly stood up from the table and ran out of the cafeteria, trying to stop my eyes from watering. The tears could wait until I was home. I decided to skip my last lessons, and just made my way home so I could cry in peace. Charlie would be angry at me, but I could just butter him up by making him his favourite meal. As soon as I got home I run up to my room and just bawled my eyes out until there were no more tears to shed. I hated that it had come to this, when I had my new confidence, and all of that just went down the drain. That night I made Chalire his dinner and just went straight up to bed without eating. It took me a while to finally get to sleep, after tossing and turning, but I fell into a deep sleep hoping that no nightmares would plague me that night.

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**Mystery POV**

We had been following this girl, Isabella Swan, for the past couple of days. It was easy to track her scent from the Cullen house to where she lived. It was crucial that we found out what she knew. We wouldn't just have a human running around that knew our secret, it could easily get out.

We followed her and watched her throughout school making sure that she did not say anything, but we soon saw her leave. It was obvious that she was upset about the Cullens leaving, though we had not yet found out whether she knows the truth. We have been careful about making any decisions as we have no idea what the seer in the Cullen family would do if she saw us lurking around this human girl.

It has yet to be decided what shall happen to the girl. She is mysterious and I have heard rumours that she cannot be affected by mental gifts. I shall have to test this theory, but shes seems like she would make a good asset to our team. But one thing is for sure, we shall be watching you Isabella Swan.

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**A/N: Hope it was okay, Bella's outfit should be on my profile for this chapter, and I'll try and write some more today. Hopefully in the next few chapters there will be more to write about and the chapters will be longer :D**


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